Are you connected to people who don't seem to be capable of fulfilling their commitments?

Monday, September 15, 2008
5:45 pm My desk

I have a story due tomorrow. It's the first story that I've had to write this semester, and it's for my JO 309: Feature Writing class. My professor, Mitchell Zuckoff (rhymes with "book-off," not the expletive), is already my favorite professor so far at BU. I actually enjoy his 3-hour long class every Tuesday.

Anyway, this story... I have to write it. And it's stressing me out. Now, I know you're all looking at your computer screens thinking, "...so write it, already!" but it's not that easy. There's a process. It's a little OCD, and it stresses me out, but I have to do it every time I go to write, or I'm even more stressed out... and then I can't write at all. I'm not crazy, I'm just fussy. Lots of writers are very particular about the conditions in which they write (I think/hope). You might even call me a creative genius. No? Just throwing it out there...

So, the process: First, I put off starting the process for as long as I can. When I start to get heartburn because the article is due in less than 24 hours, I begin. I read through all my notes, and if I've used a tape recorder to record the interview, I transcribe the whole thing. Which took me about 6 hours yesterday for a 40 minute interview. Then I print out the interview, and put them in a pile with any additional notes and quotes I have from terts (tertiary sources...love the lingo). Then I might go through the notes again and highlight any great quotes, but by now I usually get annoyed and just want to write blindly. I almost never start from the beginning because usually I don't know how I want to start. I like to do something basic, like the background stuff first. Then, before I know it, I'm rolling.

When I get stuck, I read. I read past articles I've written. I read stories out of magazines I like. I flip through Susan Orlean's The Bullfighter Checks Her Makeup, to get inspiration. I also like to go back and read what I wrote when I'm stuck, to see if I can get back into the flow of the piece. I edit out stuff I don't like. Move stuff around. Jot down ideas about other paragraphs to include. Play with my hair a lot (put it up, take it down).

Gum is a must. I like to knead it between my teeth when I'm frustrated and snap it when I come up with something really good. I can't have anything cluttering my desk except my notes and a bottle of water and a pencil. Not a pen. It has to be silent, and it helps if I'm a little cold. I don't like to wear shoes. I can't have chapped lips. And I hate being interrupted.

When I've finally finished the story (usually a few hours before it's due), I read through it and edit. Sometimes I delete entire sections. I'd rather write everything and then go back and take stuff out then feel like the story isn't complete. I almost always end with a quote a la Susan Orlean. Then I like to read the story to my parents or my sisters. I don't read it to my friends, and if I'm at school, I call my parents up to read it to them. If it's too late, I don't read it to anyone.

And if it weren't for the incredible feeling of satisfaction I get when I complete a good story, I think I would hate my major. I hate the stress, and I hate the pressure I put on myself to produce something good. When I graduate, I'll get a Bachelor of Science in Journalism, but that never made sense to me. It feels like an Art. I take my own interpretation of a person or an event or a story and put it into words for other people to interpret. That's all creativity...there's no scientific formula. I never liked science.

Once I hand the story in, either to my editor or my professor, I don't like to change it. This past summer my editor asked me to add something to a story to make it longer, and it physically pained me. I couldn't bring myself to do it. And when something gets published, and my title gets changed, it drives me crazy. They say not to get attached to your words, but that's all I've got! I made those words on that page! I put them in that order for a reason. I put serious thought into how each word and sentence sounds.

Some writers write like they're writing. I write like I talk. I used to think it made me sound less educated or intelligent than other writers. Now, I'm finding out it's just my style. And people like it.

Now that I've gotten myself all worked up about writing, I should probably go write.

But the most important part of my writing process?

Procrastinate for as long as is humanly possible.

Is it too early for dinner?

Love,
Tara